Rebuilding

It's officially two weeks since our lives have changed.  I'm learning, albeit slowly, to deal with the changes.  I've slept a bit more this last week.  I have moments.  Moments where everything is okay.  Moments where I think I'm going to be okay.  This situation will be okay.  Then, there are days like yesterday that bring me to my knees.  Yesterday started out as a beautiful day.  Then, went south in a hand basket right quick.  It had gotten so bad, I had to leave work.  I had to go to church.  Specifically, I had to see my Priest.  I needed to talk this out, I needed to cry.  I needed to learn how to breathe all over again.  Funny thing is, when your heart breaks, it crumbles your lungs too.  It feels like an elephant sitting on my lungs.  So, I off I went.  I spent the afternoon with my priest, then my husband.  Grieving.  Growing.  And, a lot of thinking.

This week I had to opportunity to spend three evenings with Fr. Larry Richards at St. Gabriel the Archangel in McKinney.  It was such a gift to be there each night.  And, I was able to receive confession with about 300 of my closest friends (not sure of actual number but it was in the hundreds).  Add that to all the text, private message conversations on facebook, calls, and the like, I am going to be okay.  Here's what I've learned this week (or was reminded of).

My work friends are awesome and so very supportive.

My sister Carol is always the logical one and voice of reason when we talk (no, you don't want to wear spandex, you'd start a fire with your thighs lol)

My best friend Tina with the calls and the text.

My Sheila, my bunco group, my chrp sisters, my ched's friends, my gurus, my family all with their unwavering love and support.

I feel bad that I have to still be carried on my mat for a while.  And, I wish I could say to my carriers "you can put me down now, I've got this, I'm going to be okay", but with all the uncertainty and being thrown into this ocean, I am clinging to my life preserver (all of the above) and my lifeguard who happens to walk on water.  Please bear with me as you carry me a bit longer.  

Thank you from the bottom of my heart to each and every one of you.  Each day brings new blessings and challenges.

And, a special thank you to my husband.  I am so glad we are going through this together.  I love you.

Until next time,

Call your mother.  She misses you.

Love,

Me