Thursday, October 23, 2008

A daily dose

I like to think that most days I can function on my own. That I can dress myself (I can), I can tie my own shoes (most days), and I can make my own decisions/choices that are mine and mine alone. Then, there are subtleties that happen throughout the day and I realize that the God places people in my life for a reason, be they a coworker, a family member, or a friend.

I've been at my job for almost seven months. And, on the whole it's been a lot of fun. Evil troll notwithstanding. While at work, I'm made a point to smile more during the lunch shift (while serving people). I make a point to be 'wonderful' when asked. I figured a) they have their own problems and b) they really don't want to know. When I can, I ask what is going on in their lives and I pray for them. By no means do I think this is anything out of the ordinary. I just am. The last two days Papi was out sick. (Actually, his name is José, but one day we called him Papi, and it just stuck). Anywho, a regular day with Papi is full of not just work, but a couple of hugs, him singing the Beatles badly, and lots of laughter. I found that I missed that. Then, this week Evil Troll gave out some not too great info. In a move to cut costs, hours were cut. Mine the most. I now have every Friday off. Every one. I would have much rather had two. But that didn't happen. Couple that with being off the meds and waiting for my hormones/emotions to level out again, I have not been in that good of a mood.

So, at work, Denise, the preacher and I were talking yesterday and she commented how she was just listening to christian music and was so filled. I commented that I had just finished talking to God with a 'please fix it or smite these people' request. (don't judge me lol.) Denise said something profound. She said that in cases like those, she asks for God to change her heart or move them. So, I've been trying that. Then today, Papi was back to himself, at work, singing badly, hugging, and laughing.

Also today, God hugged me. Physically. I can't remember who He used. But I remember being not so happy with Evil Troll today. I remember saying the Hail Mary over and over. And, I remember someone hugging me. I remember it being unexpected. Someone at work and it was a tight hug. What I can't remember is who it was. Of course, I also got hugs from Mary, Betty, and of course, lots from Papi. Apparently, God must have known I really needed them today.

God never ceases to amaze me. How He places people in my life from the unexpected hug from a virtual stranger to a quick visit with someone I haven't seen in *forever* (shout out to Shannon!!!! I miss you!). He is there *always* behind me and before me (Psalm 139). I tend to think more often than not, that I am doing this life thing all by myself. But, there He is, subtly talking to me. Some days He calls me to Him. Some days I follow, sadly, others I do not. It is so cool that He hears everything. He heard me lamenting this week. He sent me people to minister to me and people to hold me. And people to tell me that everything is going to be okay.

Lately, He has been calling me, and I have not been answering. Guess it's time to pick up the phone.

Until next time,
Here's a big hug from me {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{hug}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}. Call a friend you haven't talked to in a while. Open your bible. Read Psalm 139. It's beautiful as are you!


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