Friday, September 19, 2008

Mom's, Death, and the Brady Bunch

Yesterday was the nine month mark for Mom's death. And Myra's Mom's nine month mark is next week.

Sunday, Patti lost her Mom after a very long battle.
Yesterday, Tina lost her Mom.
And Valerie's Mom is preparing for her journey home.

Did you know that all five of us are CRHP V sisters? I bet you guys don't know how close I am to each of these spectacular ladies.

There's a special kind of relationship that you have with your Mom. Your Mom is the first one to know you (after God, of course). She's the one who nourishes you from your conception until her death. Sometimes, our Mom's aren't exactly what we need, and we get that relationship from another woman, and that's perfectly okay. Still the mother/daughter relationship is something special. There is a void that will never, ever be filled. And it takes a while, but eventually you remember how to breathe.

I can remember the moment I remembered how to breathe. It was at the six month mark. I had done nothing but exist. No laundry, no meals. I was a shell of myself. I was deeply depressed. Deeply. My heart was utterly broken. I was upset it was six months already. How could that be!?!!? For me the worst part was the actual physical pain of my heart. Then, Mary, our mother, spoke to me. She said I had a decision to make. I could die of a broken heart, or I could choose to live. I'd love to be able to tell you, I answered right away that I wanted to live. That was not the case. I had to think about it for a little while. And, ultimately, I chose to live.

These wonderful women, these sisters of family are grieving. The one thing I've learned over these last nine months is that I cannot make it better for anyone. I cannot take their pain away. I cannot lessen it. I can however be there for them as they have always, always, been there for me.

Myra, Patti, Tina, and Val:

I love you all with all that I am. I'm wearing my tennis shoes. Let's walk this road together.

Until next time,
Call your mom, or your mom role model and tell her you love her. Send her a card, make her laugh. Tell her your sorry for the vase you broke playing ball in the house. Oh, wait....that was the Brady Bunch! lol Enjoy your Moms.


No comments: